Quinquinevere

I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.

Annoying pest!!!!!

:(

I am going crazy. I am going crazy. I am going crazy.
I am going crazy. I am going crazy. I am going crazy.
I am going crazy. I am going crazy. I am going crazy.
I am going crazy. I am going crazy. I am going crazy.
I am going crazy. I am going crazy. I am going crazy.

:'(

Nothing can make me feel better then writting down all my thoughts and feelings on a paper diary when i am alone.
My blue diary is suppose to consist of thoughts which inspires me. But it turn out to be thoughts which provokes my deepest emotion and let my tears flow.
I seek my diary for comfort once in a blue moon.
When i can't pour out my feelings to anyone.
It is my blue diary i turn to.
My Dear diary................

One burden lessen.
Got one last room in my apartment rented out last night :)
No need to worry about next month rental anymore
Now my apartment is going to consist of 2 Filipino guy, 1 China lady and her son + 1 Malaysian ladie....(that's me)....United Nation Apartment... :P
Yay yay yay....lalalalalalalalal....

Went out with a bunch of Mich colleagues last nite....
One question which one of her colleague ask was, "What type of guys do you like?"
"What kinda guys are you attracted to?"
Hmmm....this makes me think.

My criteria of a perfect man in my eyes would be:-

- Someone who don't smoke ( i treasure my life & my health & i don't want my kid & me to die of 2nd hand smoke just coz some insensitive guy have no will power to quit)

- Someone who is trustworthy (Nothing attracts me more then a guy who is upright in his
speech and actions - no one wants a guy who is good in justifying all his lies)

- Someone who is mature

- Someone who is responsible

- Someone who have a sense of humour (This doesn't mean he have to be a joker all the time and makes me laugh but someone who can laugh along with me too - wouldn't it be boring if i have to laugh at his jokes all the time and he just keep cool at my jokes?!)

- Someone who can get along with my friends

- Someone who treasure his life (If a guy treasures his life, this means he would treasure mine)

- Someone who i love

- Someone who loves me more then i love him :P

Basically, a guy who just know how to treat a girl right....is my type of guy.

One of my friend send me this sms a few months back when i was down:

"A real prince won't make a princess cry...If he does...He is not the real one"

I have yet to wait for my Prince Charming to appear...lolz

It just feels so good to pour it all out
It has been a long long time since i ever cry my heart out
Have anyone ever experience the difficulty of crying?
No tears, can't cry...just can't cry
I have to say it's good to cry once in awhile to let out all anger & hurt inside
The bitterness and pain
I guess the movie "I am Sam" triggered my emotions even more and i just have to let it out.
With packets of tissues and seeking comfort in hugging my pillow,
And cry really loud cos i know that no one can hear me....
It just feels so good after i blow my nose and feeling my eyes getting all red and puffy
And i will definitely wake up with my eye lid looking out of line the next morning
Next time if any of you wan't to cry yet can't start a tear, just watch a sad movie...
"Sad movies always make me cry"..... :)

p/s: Have anyone of you ever cried really loud on purpose..really really cry and 'wahhhh' really really loud and cry yourself silly? THen you stop crying and started laughing cos you just realize that you look really silly crying so loud like a 3 year old......i did...Cried myself silly and then laugh myself silly....lolz....crying therapy.... :P

I am feeling lazy lazy lazy.....
*YaWn*
There are things to do
Dateline to meet
But i just can't seem to be bothered
I want to get things done but it just feel like
another day wasted
I am just lazy
Plain lazy
*yAwn* *YAWN*....

YaWn wif me......yyyaaaawwnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

Days aren't dim without your presence no longer
Heartache no longer exist no matter how deep the hurt is
The cut, so deep, numbs the pain
No more tears
The moment, it has been so long
Since that day, months ago
Nothing matters anymore
Lost the meaning of love, the understanding of love
For love have brought many bitterness

Can't feel, can't react, can't love
Mere words which doesn't mean a thing
Fools are we?
To those who deeply love
But fools are we no longer
For those who have tasted the bitterness of love
Will they feel love again?
Can the feeling of love be regain?
Can love be trusted?

How then can you say you truly love a person?
When your actions and deeds deny your words?
If repeatable mistakes are redeemable for forgiveness at all time
Then who in this world will realize?
Or repent?
Or grieve?
If apology is one word which can free us from all mistakes
Where is our right to fairness and equality?
Everthing will be taken lightly and for granted
Perhaps, forgiveness is the one word that will unchain us from all hatred

Sigh....hols is over for me.
Yes....am back!!
I am stil hanging in the air craving for the holiday sensation to fill me up again.
But nah...i am not gona get any more hols...and that's so so sad :(
I miss Townsville. Or more like i miss the freedom of not having to sit in the office for more then 8hrs and work my ass off.
I miss life as a student.
Dang!
I have yet to post up all my hols pictures from Townsville and Cairns...hehehe
Haven't got all the pics yet. Have yet to wait for Celby to send me all the pics before i am able to post it up here.
Maybe tomorrow, maybe the day after tomorrow, maybe the day after the next...or maybe..maybe...
Lolz...just wait and see.... :P

I am back!!!
Back from Cairns :)
Lazy to update you guys at the moment.
Too many pics to upload and info to update.
Will do that when i am back to S'pore.
For now, i will just enjoy my hols..........
Ciao guyz.....muakz :P